@ the Wild Child Reserve
or so thinks my brother. My little brother brought his daughter to our house for the first time. But, it wasn’t just to meet the family, it was also so he could have a photo shoot with her. When he got here, he said, “I always feel stupid posing for pictures, can you just snap pics of us together throughout the day?”
Of course, I can. Here’s some of what I got…
Are you someone’s idea of a photographer? share your photos here.
So, my dadis a custodian at a local elementary school. Yesterday, he caught a lady throwing out hundreds of dollars worth of learning material. Of course, he thought of me and brought it all to my house. I’ll admit, there is some neat stuff in there.. like Giant Alphabet Letters, a bunch of CDs with songs, and some game boards and pieces with no instructions - which is awesome. But, there’s also some stupid junk in there, too. Like these multiplication problems out of a collection of worksheets. This is exactly why my son doesn’t go to school. The problems are stupid and they don’t make sense.. and to a logical kid like my son, it’s just an argument waiting to happen. A chance to prove the teacher wrong.
Brooke is cooking in 3 silver pots on the stove. Each pot has 4 wooden sppons in it. How many wooden spoons are there altogether?
Really? She’s cooking with 4 wooden spoons in each pot?
Evan is cooking steaks. Five people are eating and he is cooking 3 steaks for each person. How many steaks will Evan cook in all?
Three steaks for each person?? That’s a little extravagant.
Jusy is raising skunks. She has 8 skunks. Each skunk has one white stripe. How many white stripes do they have altogether?
Raising Skunks?
Seven turtles are having a race. They each crawl two blocks down the street. How many blocks do the turtles crawl in all?
This sounds like a trick question. They crawled two blocks. Unless you count each turtle’s blocks separately, and that’s stupid.
Denise planted 7 grape vines. No grapes grew on each plant. How many grapes did Denise have altogether?
Another example of a stupid question. Is this kind of question not a little bit insulting?
Ice cream sandwiches at the store cost 9 cents each. If Stephen buys 3, how much will he spend?
Nine cents? Really? Where?
Nicholas liked the pizza Becky made. He ate two slices each from 4 different pizzas. How many slices did he eat?
The story sets up Nicholas as a second grader. A second grader that ate 8 pieces of pizza? That’s an entire pizza.
Lawrence counted four anthills. Each anthill had 0 ants crawling on top. How many ants did he count?
Another insult to their intelligence.
Liz was watching 9 starfish running around on the beach. She counted 5 arms on each one. How many starfish arms altogether?
Starfish run around on the beach? This might be different if they hadn’t worked to set up each question as realistic….
Greg’s spelling list has 3 words he doesn’t know. If Greg has to write each word 5 times on the blackboard, how many words will Greg write altogether?
Another trick question. He’s still only writing three words. It doesn’t matter how many times he writes them, it’s still the same three words.
I’m sure there will be more entertaining material as I sift through the contents of these boxes. Wouldn’t kids be better off just learning multiplication when it affects their lives, than answering crazy trick questions like these?
So, lots of wild things are happening around here. On the day Ivan died, my husband’s oldest daughter (from a previous marriage) called up to tell me she was pregnant. She’s 19. The very next day, she called to ask if I would drive her to a Pregnancy Center to have a test and get a referral. Yes, she really is pregnant. I happen to be the only one who reacted with a huge grin and a “WOOHOO.” Yes, they are unmarried and it’s unplanned and they aren’t quite prepared in any way. But, it’s a done deal.. she’s pregnant and she doesn’t like the idea of abortion.. she’s made up her mind and there’s nothing left to do but be happy. Though, some folks would disagree. LOL
So, she is living in an inappropriate environment for a new child to come into the world. I offered her a room in our home. She and her boyfriend gratefully accepted and are collecting their things to move in this week.
I am very excited and decided to make the room a kind of relaxing sanctuary for them to enjoy their pregnancy together. I went to the dollar general to pick up some sheets for their bed and a few little things to make their room more comfortable and relaxing. I didn’t think about how this was going to affect me financially. I just thought about the pregnant mother and the precious little baby and the new dad and what they needed to feel loved and secure and stress free. Bed sheets, pillows, a small scrapbook to record her thoughts and feelings about things, some picture frames to add a personal touch to her room, a small flowering plant.
I was standing in line behind a woman who was checking out. When she paid for her things, she turned to me and gave me a $20 bill with the instructions to put it toward my purchase.
This was a complete stranger. The woman didn’t know me. She didn’t know that she was actually paying for things that were being given to a 19 yr old pregnant girl. It was one of those random moments in the universe when things align perfectly.
Thanks.. to all of you.. for being so generous and caring and watching out for the other folks that wander into your life - even if it’s just for a split second at a checkout counter at the dollar general.
My best friend, I’d known for 11.5 years, died on Tuesday Afternoon. But, he squeezed 80.5 decades of love into that time. If you do the math, you might realize that I’m talking about a being of the dog nature. But, he was more than a dog. He was my family, my friend. 11 years. That’s 5 years before I met my husband or my oldest son was born. A lot of people might not understand, because they don’t have a bond with their dog the way I had.
When I went to the pound, I was 17, looking for a puppy. No one else was in the room, but I heard my name called from behind me. I swung around to see who called me… and there he was. Not a puppy, but my soulmate. We were meant to be.
I did some traveling in my late teens, and he came with me. He came to the store with me and waited by the door. We lived on acres of land and he was free to come and go as he pleased… and he always pleased to come home. He brought me gifts… sure, they were dead chipmunks and huge river rats.. but, they would have been delicious if I was a dog. I always thanked him for his presents. Once, he brought me a tiny baby rabbit. I didn’t even know it was in his mouth until he gently set it down before me. It was alive.
He went on all of our camping trips.. usually leading the way down the trail.. He hiked with us, went swimming with us, lived life with us. He was here, everyday.. inside.. outside.. following us around.
He could count to 10. He could do all the awesome dog tricks and he could speak. He talked to us.. with low growls, barks. I could recognize what he was barking at just by listening to his tone. He could talk to us and tell us what he wanted.. food, water, go outside. He survived two baby boys, pulling on his hair, trying to ride him like a horse, and enjoyed every minute of it.. tail wagging and tongue flapping.
Everyone whoever met Ivan would say the same thing, “That’s the best dog I’ve ever met.” He had a reputation of always being a gentleman, always being loving and intelligent. Everyone had their own nickname for him…. Blackie, Big “I”, Pooter.
I more than loved my dog. I was IN love with him. He was beautiful. I’ve never met anybody like him. I always joked with Dave (my husband) that he was second in line to the throne. And I would ask Dave, “how much do you love me?” and he would say, “Only a little less than Ivan.” Because everyone who knew us together, knew that Ivan was my first love in life. I met him when I was 17, he was my “right out of high school” sweetheart.
When I first got married and had my oldest son, my husband and I and my son and Ivan were all sleeping in the same twin bed. We were just laughing about that last night. Eventually, Ivan made more room for us by moving to the floor. But, he still kept our company every night.
Tuesday, when I woke up and saw him, I just knew it was his last day. I spent the day on the kitchen floor with him.. making him comfortable and talking to him as I always did - like the real person he was. For my boys, they’ve known Ivan since the day they were born. He’s been a real, loving part of this family.
My Notes from the Universe for Tuesday, June 16…
–In the end, Candy, all you have are memories, and usually the ones you have with friends are the ones you treasure most.
I got you, babe -
The Universe
We have two awesome new things, here. On Sunday, my father in law brought over these theater seats that he found while dumpster diving at his church. OK, I dunno if he actually got in the dumpster LOL. But, he spotted them in the garbage pile and asked if he could take them.
Aren’t they just totally neato?
Yesterday, a man came up to the door and asked if I wanted a large truckload of mulch. A neighbor had a tree that fell over and had the tree service come out to get it off the front of their home. The boys love the big pile of mulch.
Here they are staking their claim.
I just wanted to smash stereotypical images of seven year old boys wielding very, very sharp knives.
Some stuff that’s gone down during our time away from the internet.
You can see our garden, here on the WCR Photoblog.
Most importantly, Rowdy turned Lucky Number Seven. SEVEN! It’s crazy, it certainly doesn’t feel like seven years.
His cake is a turtle. Let me tell you, it was fun to make, but not easy.
Also… let’s see…
Made a quill pen… [make your own]
Wood burned…
Colored a lamp shade
Made a ton of spore creatures…. you can see them here. Below, you can see Rowdy’s SPORE version of George Washington.
Got painted up for summer…
My youngest decided to go vegetarian.. Here’s his expression when you mention eating meat…
And here’s his expression when you give him a vegetarian meal..
So, weird things pop into my head when I’m cooking dinner and I can hear the joyous sounds of children proudly showing off their spore creatures to Daddy in the living room. Strange things like, “What is Death like?”
OK, it didn’t start off quite that dark. It was more of a gradual progression toward that topic. I was listening to my children and thinking about how wonderful were the days they were born. How we had prepared. How we were all gathered there, together, awaiting their arrival. Expecting, knowing they were on the way…. excited and loving and happy. They were both extraordinary days.
When my thoughts just kind of rambled off course, “I hope dying is like being born.”
You know, somewhere someone getting ready for you.. knowing you’re on the way. Preparing. Expecting. Gathering together to welcome you into your new place with love.
Maybe you know that I am an Anything Is Possibilist. I like to take a moment to let things like that sink in and settle as an absolute truth.. at least for a little while. So, my mind continued along this path… on to comparing this world to a womb… a bubble, with babies in it and us.. stuck in our amniotic sacs, you know.. bodies. Wandering around on earth in the dark so to speak, not fully developed and just waiting to be born.
I wondered if late-term babies dream and what their dreams would be like…..
The very next day, I laid down to take a nap. I had a dream that I was visiting my mom, who is deceased. In my dream, I knew she was dead. It’s funny, now that she’s dead, I always know she’s dead when she’s in my dreams. I never dream her alive. Anyway, I was visiting her where she lived. It was a huge, massive mansion. I never saw the outside. We were inside. It kind of resembles a hotel, actually. You know, lots of long hallways filled with doors. The lighting is very soft. The dream was very detailed. I must hesitate before I say it was not real, that’s how vivid and detailed it was. We were in this massive mansion, she mentioned it was her friend’s mansion, though she didn’t mention which friend. Walking down the hall, we chatted a bit. But, mostly it was difficult for me to say much because here I am visiting someone who I know is dead… and it’s my mom. Makes for a very choked up event, I could feel the aching pain in my throat.. I remember, thinking in my mind that, “it doesn’t matter if we talk much, I just want to be with her for a while.”
We walked down hallways until we came to a childcare center. In someone’s house. A real full-fledged day care… with about 7 or 8 children, their artwork and things hanging on the door. Names written in red ink on yellow stars, even. The little half-door that the teacher can open the top, but leave the bottom part closed. This was my deja-vu… strange to have deja-vu in a dream. But, I did have it.. when I saw the daycare. Like a flood, the mansion.. the hallways.. the daycare.. I’d been here before with my mom, and the women.. Two female women were there and my mom communicated with them… non verbally, more like telepathy, though they still responded with body language and gestures. I understood they were communicating, but had trouble understanding what was going on. I still don’t know why my mom was speaking to daycare workers. Later, after I woke up, I decided she must be a daycare worker - or has a child in the daycare.. though, that doesn’t sound like my mom, to have a child in daycare.
We walked out of the building, but I never saw it. I never looked back to see it. We walked forward, and we were in a store. I remember thinking that it was a strange time of the year for the store to have it’s Christmas displays out. But, I remember this very large wooden reindeer decoration that looked very nice and it caught my eye because it didn’t look like cheap shit. I noticed that all of the decorations looked of high quality and decided that maybe it was a Christmas in the Summer sale, or something.
We kept walking and I thought, “I could pick up a few things while I’m here.. ” Mostly groceries that I knew we needed in the non-dream world. But, my thought was interrupted by my mom who wanted to pick out something for “the boys,” my sons. She looked around for a minute and picked out a winter outfit.. long sleeves, long pants. I thought it was strange for her to be picking out something wintery when it is summer, but I thought, maybe it’s on clearance. She only chose one outfit. One outfit, two boys. It made me think that she must know the boys are right about the same size and clothes for them is interchangeable. I looked at the outfit and realized that it was much too small for the boys. I asked her to let me see it and the size was much too small for them. But, I didn’t say anything.
Later, we were sitting and chatting, when my mom began to act like I had announced I was leaving…. hugs, goodbye.. But, I was confused. I had no such intention. I started to ask her why she thought I was leaving when I woke up. I felt like I’d been awake the whole time, but also like I’d been sleeping forever…. longer than forever. Time is such a weird thing, I’d only been sleeping for a little over an hour.
There’s a few folks on this internet thingy, telling y’all how to deschool. For those of you who don’t know what deschooling is, it is ridding yourself of the school mentality. No more schooly words, actions, thoughts. Just get rid of them. Stop thinking in terms of separating everything out into subjects and topics. Everything is connected. Math = History = Science = Writing. It’s all one big thing, not a bunch of tiny little things. When you stop learning history, you stop learning math. When you begin to learn something about science, you begin to learn about Medieval times. It’s one in the same. One Big Happy. A whole big bag of M&Ms, in your hand at the same time.. not just one or two handed out at someone else’s discretion. Also, no assessments and grades and curriculum and quizzing and trying to learn things in ways that don’t work for you. There’s a lot to deschooling… seeds were planted, in your mind, by the school system (and school-oriented society in general) and by the time you’re an adult they have grown into full fledged live oaks.. branching off into so many directions.. especially, in the direction of your children.
Over the weekend, I was reminded once again, that Kindergarten registration begins on July 20th. I don’t care and my mother in law really, in her heart, knows that. But, she reminds me because she’s trying to revive the dying plant (in my mind) that *is* school. By this point, though, the plant is beyond help. I realized it was not a stately tree, it is more like poison ivy. Ironically, I’m not allergic to poison ivy.. I can roll around in it and nothing happens.. but, my boys are severely allergic to poison ivy. So, I know I have to get rid of it, for their sakes.
It *IS* summer and because summer is usually associated with wild, free children that are quickly emptying their brains of anything they learned in school, I thought Daily Deschool is important at this time of year.. building up to August, when all the new homeschoolers will be searching for just what is the best choice for their families.
So, I’m going to start posting some steps to help folks get started with deschooling. Kind of like a 12 step program. LOL.. First step, admit you have a problem.
Nah. I’m just kidding, you don’t have to admit you have a problem, you will see it flare up once you know how to recognize it.
The REAL first step, I’ve read is “Do Nothing.” But, I’d like to add my two cents to do nothing. I think “Do Nothing” doesn’t give many folks a good idea of exactly what “Do Nothing” means.
Let’s start out with Observation. Observation is a key to unlocking mysteries. Observe your children when you “do nothing.” When you don’t interfere with their learning process… what happens? When you don’t interrupt them.. what happens? When you don’t insist on showing them the better, more efficient ways of doing things… what happens? When you let them explore their world in a way that they are comfortable doing .. what happens? When you don’t insist that you are correct, always.. what happens? When they are allowed to question.. what happens? When they are free to express themselves.. what happens? When you do nothing to stop them from trying to cook their own supper, what happens? When you don’t step in to fill their schedule with activities… what happens? When you don’t explain why things can’t happen the way the child thinks it can/will… what happens?
A good example of that last one is my son’s recent quest to learn to play the guitar. He wants to play guitar, so he got one for his birthday. When we sat down to try to play the songs included in the kit, he got mad. Why? Because he doesn’t want to play Mary had a little lamb, or Row Row Row your Boat. He has his heart set on playing “Fire on the Mountain,” by Marshall Tucker Band. I told other folks his goal. I am completely dedicated to helping learn to play this song. But, other folks had a completely different reaction. Some laughed, but most of them say, “He can’t do that… you have to learn the chords first… you have to start small and work your way up!” That’s ridiculous, schooly thinking.
Why can’t you start at the top of the mountain? Why does he have to know chords to learn to play the song he wants to play? The answer is… he doesn’t. Starting small doesn’t mean he has to start by learning a song he doesn’t care to know.. it means to take it one note, one chord at a time. Why not learn how to play the guitar by learning how to play a song he wants to play? Will he not learn some chords this way? Will he not learn a bit about reading guitar tabs? Will he not learn strumming and picking techniques, trying to match sounds in the song? Why have no confidence in letting the kid explore the guitar the way he wants? That’s the difference between school thinking and the way kids think. School thinking says they have to be taught in little steps, using assigned models… like Mary Had a Little Lamb.. rather than just doing it. School thinking says it’s too hard rather than let’s just try it and see what happens. Kids love trial and error. Trial and error motivates them, it inspires them, it drives them.. Where a schoolish thinker might see time wasted, a trial-and-error learner sees opportunity, discovery, exploration. They like mistakes. It gives them the chance to learn something for themselves. Every mistake made is learning.
So, just take some time to observe. Watch, listen.. and do nothing. You might learn something.
